Lego-morial

This is a picture of the lego man quilt square memorial that Ethan, Ben and Will made for Mimi.

Love through Legos.

Pretty cool.

Emotions

It's hard to blog when you are sad.

It's hard to parent when you are sad.

It's hard to do a lot when you are sad.

My mom passed away June 7th.

I am sad.

Update

Mom in hospital again.  Severe edema in legs and is on IV diuretic.

I am too tired to write but thought I'd post a few pictures from the last few months.

Ethan the beekeeper

 Preschool Carnival

 Just hangin' around

Heartfelt Thanks

Not much to write about when one spends a majority of the day sitting in a hospital room.

I have had time to reflect though.  Lots of time to reflect.

These are my thoughts:

I married a saint.  Okay, maybe not quite that level but close.  While sitting with my mom she said, "Poor Kevin having to raise those boys alone.  He's doing a good job."  I replied, "Well, I'd like to think I have something to do with it Mom."  She looks at me blankly, "Well, I'm not so sure."

Also, I have the best in-laws.  No doubter abouter.  K's sister and brother-in-law came for a weekend and played with the boys, mowed the grass and attempted to do all of the laundry.  Susan's comment, "I keep thinking I have done all of it and then I turn the corner and find another basket!!"  I KNOW.  Laundry just keeps on coming and coming and coming.....It was such a blessing to have them here.

K's parents just left yesterday after planning my meals for the next week and doing grocery shopping.  K's dad also helped clean the gutters and spread some mulch.  Yard work has been put on the back burner around here.

I am feeling a bit pulled like warm taffy.  Wanting to be in one place and needing to be in another.  This care giving is hard work. 

So a shout out to those friends and family that have gone above and beyond.  Thanks.  I can't express how much it means.

Me....version 2.0

I was working on the computer when I couldn't find my document.  "Where is it?  Ugh, this frustrates me that I can't ever find anything," I complain to my tech savvy husband.

"Oh."  He says.  "Here's the problem.  Remember a couple of years back when your desktop died and I had to create a Sally version 2?"

"Wha?" I say.  He had recreated me on the computer.  I laugh it off and say, "That's what I want to do in real life.  Throw away the old version and create a new one."

A newer sporty model. 

One that has boundless energy and enthusiasm for life's challenges and takes everything in stride.

One that can control her emotions and not cry at the grocery store when someone asks, "How are you?"

One that has all the patience in the world for her children and their little idiosyncriseese.

One that knows how to spell idiosyncrasies.

Of course, I would be a lot more expensive.  Perhaps taller.  Auburn hair. 

Watch out.  Coming soon.  To a store near you.

It was a tough morning.  I stared into my mother's eyes as she cried, "I'm sick.  I'm really sick." 

"I know, Mom.  You aren't feeling well.  You are nauseated." 

"I don't understand why I can't get better."

I am at a loss for words.  I held her close and said comforting thoughts that came to mind, "Remember yesterday, you didn't feel well in the morning and then later, you felt much better.  Maybe today is the same thing." 

She said, "What did I do to deserve this?  Did I do something wrong?" 

"No no. Of course not.  You did everything right Mom.  You are a great mother and grandmother.  Everyone loves you.  You are the best."  

"I feel like the worst."

I hugged her tight and said "I love you" and prayed for her to feel better.  "Do you want me to get you anything?  Can you eat some crackers?  Some jello? Some tea?" 

"Maybe some tea." 

I force fed her a few bits of jello and some poached egg.  I fixed tea the way she likes, 5 minutes of brewing, a spoonful of sugar in the raw and some organic milk.  "Just sit it down on the dresser and I'll drink it.  Right now I just want to sleep."

And so I left her.  To sleep.  Which she did.  I went outside and picked spring violets the way I used to when I was little.  Gently plucking each one from the ground with the longest stem possible.  I returned them to her house and put them in the basket vase that her Grandmother gave her.  Just like she used to when I presented her my childhood bouquets.

 I returned this evening to find her better.  She had eaten well the rest of the day.  I soaked her a lavender bubble bath and got her ready for bed.  "You have plenty of other things to do besides take care of me.  I'm sure you are sick of it." 

"I'm not," I assured her.  "I do for you the same that you would do for me if things were reversed.  In case you haven't figured it out yet, Mom, I like being around you." 

She smiled and said, "Good night.  Be careful driving home." 

Maybe it was the tea.  Maybe it was the prayer.  Maybe it was the violets.  Whatever it was I am thankful for it and want to bottle it up to use again in those moments when I feel helpless.

The Orchid Whisperer

My mom has taught me a lot of things, one of them being how to get an orchid to rebloom.  Three simple ice cubes a week and look what happened! 

We have tried to keep orchids alive and blooming for years and finally discovered this trick.

My mom has been feeling pretty bad for a while.  Hopefully the spring weather and blooms aplenty will help her recover more easily.